Surviving Motherhood

I wanted to change the name of my blog to “Surviving Motherhood”, which I still think should be the title of the book I want to write about motherhood—once I have some TIME!…. But anyway, I didn’t change the name, cause as it turns out there is a mother out there who already created that blog, except she promotes herself to tired moms, and tries to convince them that everything is going to be ok cause God loves them!!! She goes and speaks at events and stuff—convincing these ladies not to despair, cause God is always there.  UHHHHHHH….. is he comin’ over to pick up all these toys, vacuum, steam mop the floors, do a few loads of laundry and pick up more toys????  That’s what I thought.

I wonder how many tired moms buy into that…. whatever!  Don’t get me wrong, I believe in God… but I’m also realistic.

If I ever DO write my book, it will have important info for anyone thinking of becoming a mom.  The stuff that the “What to Expect” books definitely don’t tell you!  FOR EXAMPLE….  No one tells you that you can kiss alone time good bye (pretty much).  Forget about going to the bathroom in peace, and start coming to terms with the fact that you will eat your baby’s crumbs after he snatches that sandwich away from you (and you give it up to him without an argument, because you’re just happy that he’s eating SOMETHING).  No one tells you that kids have this extra sense to catch you when you finallyyyyyy sit down, and ask for milk, or show you that they need a diaper change, or pull something off the counter…. etc.

Motherhood is HARD BUSINESS.  It’s not for everyone… and the sooner society starts telling the TRUTH about it, instead of just publicizing all the precious moments… I’m pretty certain we will have less abused kids in the world.  Motherhood is NOT for selfish people, cause really— you can’t tape your child to the wall, and watch your TV show in peace.  That girl wasn’t crazy, she just WENT crazy cause she wasn’t ready to be a mom.  Motherhood is constantly giving giving giving, and the truth is some women are just not ready– or don’t even have the ability to do that.

Bottom line – there needs to be a checklist a woman must look at before thinking of motherhood.  If you do NOT check each and every single box, you’re definitely not ready.

Just sayin……

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Nap time

Ask any mom about nap time, and you will automatically see their face change.  Nap time is the sacred time that a mom gets to have AT LEAST an hour or two of QUIET time.  Most people don’t really understand exactly how important this hour is to a mom, therefore totally not understanding the dirty looks a mom will give you if you speak above a whisper, or slam the door, or even walk by the room the kids are sleeping in!!!!

To everyone else, it’s lunch time… it’s time to answer their phone, it’s time to laugh out loud, time to do the gardening with loud blowers, time to slam their car door and activate their alarms, listen to loud music while washing their car, yell at each other… etc etc.

If you are a mom — new or old — you have come to HATE, wait maybe HATE isn’t strong enough of a word— DESPISE anything that interrupts nap time.

On the other hand, I have to say it is quite unfair.  I mean, how the heck should our mailman know that my kids are sleeping in the room upstairs, and that he shouldn’t slam the mailbox after putting our mail in there DURING NAP TIME!??!!

How should the annoying guy on the Harley know that there are kids napping on the street, and that between 1-3pm, he should NOT roar by…?

How should the gardeners know that my kids have super sensitive hearing, and wake up when they start up their blowers and mowers….??!!

I understand all that.

But I hate them anyway… :)

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East vs. West

We have had such a hard time deciding which dialect our kids should learn… eastern or western Armenian.  My husband is from Hayasdan, so naturally he speaks eastern, and I was born here but went to Chamlian and learned western Armenian.  We speak both at home, and it’s apparent that the kids understand both.

One of the main deciding factors of which school we’d like to send our kids to, is based on which Armenian we want them to learn.  IDEALLY, I’d love for them to learn both — eastern AND western, with BOTH spellings.  It seems I am alone on this, since out of the more than 10 all day Armenian schools in Southern California, NONE offer this.  Actually, as far as I know only a few even offer eastern!  (And then we wonder why we don’t have enough students in Armenian schools). And less than a few offer Apovian spelling.

I want my children to go to a school that will not only teach them the necessary academics to be admitted into a university, but to also ASSIST ME in raising them to be responsible, well rounded Armenians.  I stress the “assist me” part, because I don’t see ANY school doing that job successfully without working together with parents.

My kids have a lot of cousins in Armenia, not to mention grandparents, aunts and uncles.  Even if we do not end up living there at some point in the future, naturally they will be going frequently, if not every summer.  Don’t I want my kids to be able to speak/read/write eastern Armenian with the same ease as their cousins and peers?

At the same time, it would be a shame for them to not learn western Armenian, as that is also part of who they are….their own history.

So really, I’m looking for a school that does not exist yet…. which does not make sense to me.  If we are teaching our children to be proud Armenians, to go to Armenia, take their knowledge there to change our country for the better… why are we setting them up for failure, by not giving them what they need?  Knowledge of the eastern dialect, and the state spelling of our nation.

I don’t think it would be difficult to teach children both.  They’re not so different, and if they practice the differences at a young enough age, switching back and forth will be natural for them!  We can add just a page between each language chapter, “How would we say/write it in Hayasdan”, and show the differences.  We can have just one class a week devoted to eastern pronunciation…. Even this is better than nothing!

I’d like to hear everyone’s opinions.

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Be the change!

For years I have had “be the change you want to see in the world” on a post-it note always stuck to different surfaces, in different places where I was working. It’s been posted in my classroom, on walls, on my computer monitor, on my mug…. It seems I always wanted to remember Ghandi’s famous quote… It has inspired me so many times.

Now, amid all the daily craziness, I am committing myself to a project. A project SO large. A project which will affect SO many people. A project SO veryyyy important…. PRESERVING A CULTURE AND LANGUAGE.

Imagine. Me… A stay at home (or shall I say house arrested by my kids) mom. I do about 10 loads of laundry a week, cook a dinner each day, work on my REAL work while the kids play or nap, feed/change/entertain my kids, clean the house (a lot of vacuuming is involved)… And now I’m setting out to start a project which will help preserve our Armenian identity.

HELPPPPP!!! I must be crazy…

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SPEAK UP!

I never thought I’d get such a strong response from people who felt the same way I did about what my kids are watching/listening to.  Thanks to all those who are sharing and liking the Facebook page I made.

Let’s take a poll on how we feel about Armenian educational materials….

With that said, please continue sharing the Facebook page with all your friends, but also take a minute and send it to someone you think could TRULY contribute to this project. When it comes to creating something new, you never know who is going to throw out an idea that can re-shape an entire project, improving its outcome!

In the coming months we are looking forward to organizing a group of people willing to put in their time to help start this project!  (Come on guys, I can’t do it all by myself).  I know most of us are parents, we work, and we have a million other things waiting to get done — but this is by far the most important thing you can do for your child… raise them to be well rounded, educated, caring, devoted Armenians!

Like my “Dollarthon” project from years ago (I collected $1 from people to buy Christmas gifts for kids in orphanages), I’m not one to expect anything big from anyone.  But I believe that “little raindrops make a puddle” (and I’m not just talking about money).

Staying involved is as easy as expressing your comment/like/dislike/idea…. So SPEAK UP, this is for all of us. :)

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Entertaining my kids

I recently taught myself how to download videos from youtube, put them back to back, and create DVD’s which would entertain my kids, keeping them in one room while they play, so that I can get work done (cause I work from home).

I then realized how quickly the kids are picking up on English…. which was counterproductive, as I want Armenian to be their first language – since they will learn English regardless. Haroot was saying “socks” and “horse”… WHAT THE HECK?!

After making a few DVD’s of music videos, and old Armenian cartoons, now I’m out of material. How is it that we have a culture dating back to prehistoric times– we are one of the first civilizations on earth (if not THE first), and we can’t get together and create children’s programming for our kids so our rich language and culture is not lost — so that our kids do not disappear into this melting pot!????

R-I-D-I-C-U-L-O-U-S!!!!!

With that said, I’m forming a group on Facebook, and will start the movement to change Armenian Educational Entertainment for our children….

Face it, the current available Armenian entertainment for my kids out there quite simply SUCKS… and they do not compare to Sesame Street or Yo Gabba Gabba!

Join me, and let’s change the future of the new Armenian generation….

You don’t need to have kids to participate… just have ideas, and be willing to put in your 2 cents).

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Trying?

As a former teacher, parents sometimes feel comfortable to talk about “random” facts with you. They share info with you, like you’re part of the family. (That’s how it SHOULD be … but if you multiply that relationship by the number of students in the class– you see what I mean). I guess fate brought me to one such relationship. One conversation led to the question, “so when are you having kids of your own?”– which led to the discovery of PURE GOLD!

Dr. Jing, at TCM http://www.tcmhealingcenter.com in Santa Monica, CA. If you have any health issues that you think western medicine just isn’t hitting the nail — especially fertility issues, whether it has to do with trying, bad prego symptoms,– or even just allergies, GO SEE HER! She is the reason I have my firstborn, and lastborn (HAHA!). Acupuncture is AMAZING, and even though the teas she’ll prescribe taste worse than the worst thing you’ve ever tasted, they’re miraculous. I’ve referred SO many people (men AND women) to her, whether it was for acne, allergies, or infertility… everyone agrees that Dr. Jing was honest and helpful.

Now that I helped you get pregnant… let’s move on. :)

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